July 2008

I just got back from the beach. I left here around midnight and drove a half an hour or so to get there. I smoked a cigarette while I listened to the waves and watched the stars. I’m not sure if it’s my city’s pollution or if it was just a really clear night, but it was beautiful. The sky was practically lit up with them. It’s not something I ever get to see from my backyard.

Then I went to some bar, which I think is one of two bars in Port Stanley, and had a beer and a smoke. It was a crazy place. It was a house that was converted to a bar and I bumped my head on the ceiling once or twice. It seemed like everyone knew each other there. I wasn’t drunk enough to hit on any girls and none approached me so it was a bust on that front but it was still pretty cool. Afterwards I went back to the beach for another cigarette and I’m fairly certain that I saw some people skinny dipping, though I couldn’t be certain because of how dark it was. Then I hopped back in my car and took off.

I got stopped by the RIDE (Reduced Impaired Driving Everywhere) program coming out of Port Stanley (the beach town). It was kind of scary because even though I wasn’t nearly drunk I’m not actually supposed to have any alcohol whatsoever with my class of license. I said that I had one beer and then he made me say the alphabet and then told me to have a good night. He didn’t check my driver’s license, thank Christ. It was kind of scary.

It’s nice driving through the country at night when you’re practically the only car on the road and you can smell the country air. It was cool.

I’m not sure what prompted me to go. I was feeling like utter shit earlier tonight and suddenly got the urge to take off and leave. I felt like I was having an anxiety attack or something. Half way out of the city it kept kicking in and telling me to just go back home but then I thought of this quote from Ghost Dog that kept me going:

Ghost Dog: In the words of the ancients, one should make his decision within the space of seven breaths. It is a matter of being determined and having the spirit to break through to the other side.

Also

Ghost Dog: When one has made a decision to kill a person, even if it will be very difficult to succeed by advancing straight ahead, it will not do to think about doing it in a long, roundabout way. One’s heart may slacken, he may miss his chance, and by and large there will be no success. The Way of the Samurai is one of immediacy, and it is best to dash in headlong.

(I hadn’t decided to kill anyone but I feel like it applied to my situation. I had to dash in headlong and break through to the other side.)

ANYWAYZ. Je suis chez moi maintenant alors je vais dormir.

Night.

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That phone survey call center place finally got back to me. I’m going in for training on the fifth. Fuckz yah. I’ll finally have a bit of cheddar to throw around.

PEACE

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The DNS is all fuxored right now. Connect to the following IP:  64.18.143.173

/server 64.18.143.173

Is the command.

Kirill didn’t renew igloos.ca so irc.igloos.ca won’t work for a while. It’s been transferred to irc.hatt.us for the time being but it may be a while before that takes effect.

Gracias.

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I went to Grand Bend with a couple of my friends.

We buried my friend in sand and had a couple beers and checked out the girls. (Though there were barely any there. Grand Bend nightlife FTL.)

At the end of the night we found some stray dog and my friends gave it a couple pieces of hot dog. The owner came out and started flipping out. It was weird. He ended up apologising for “eyeballing me” and shook my head. I just said it was cool. There’s lots more detail but I’m too lazy/hazy in memory to write it down.

AND NOW TODAY, I think that I’ll lay in the sun on the computer. That’s always fun. PZ.

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I couldn’t find them anywhere so I decided to type them out myself. Enjoy. (Or don’t.)

Verse 1:

I got six pairs of Nikes by the front door
I got six more by the TV so it’s war
The only time I pick em up’s to put em on my feet
And that’s the reason why my girl
Is trying to kill me in my sleep
Every time I go to change the trash bag in the barrell
It gets stuck because it’s overflowing with dirty apparel
I don’t do laundry, I just buy new socks and undies
I don’t give a fuck, I been this way since I was rocking Gumbies
I love this girl to death but I’m startin to wonder,
“Does she love me back? Or does she really want me six feet under?”
Cause she claims I don’t do anything around the house
But play a game of cat and mouse with Foxy and me
Yo we’re tearin’ up the couch
I said I love em, she said if you really loved em
You would change their kitty litter, not just feed them crap and bug em
Please, back on up cause you’re in the way
I’m trying to watch the game, girl. Is that okay?
“My friends all say…”
Your friends all say nothin. I’m tryin to hear today.

Chorus:

You don’t wanna kill me, you wanna mould me and build me
Until I’m the perfect person for you but I think that’s silly (It’s true)
You don’t wanna beat me, you wanna school me and teach me
Until I’m the perfect person for you but you cannot reach me (Nope)

Verse 2:

Now this situation, livin with a mental patient
Posin as my girlfriend got me lookin for some ventilation
And I kick my feet up when I’m home, I turn the heat up, leave the seat up
That leads up to me gettin hands beat up, she’s G’ed up
I know she’s thinkin I ain’t worth a buck in change
If I’m not sellin records on the wall and no she fuckin frames
I can’t explain the pain I go through
Calm is like that so I told you
You can go to family functions for brownie points and get nothin
But mashed potatoes and stuffing, have fun, uncomfortable hugging
That goes hand in hand when man meets woman’s fam
You understand? I do. I used to view her as this undomestic goddess
Now the food and work and Rachel Rea have taken her away
I know you’re thinkin, “Dude, don’t complain.”
I’m not complainin, I’m explainin how she’s drainin every brain muscle inside my frame
And yo maybe I’m nuts. I never said she’s feminazi
But she’s trying to turn her boyfriend into Emerald Agassi
And I can’t do that, I’mma plan to pack
How I look comin home with a can of that?
How’d I look comin home with a Santa hat?
You know I buy you things, you can handle that (Right?)

[Chorus]

And here’s the song if you want to hear it:

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Turns out that girl I couldn’t get the other night is married. So no loss. In fact, I’m telling myself that the only reason she wasn’t all over me is because she has a husband. (I think that I wrote about that. If not, too bad. I’m sure you can figure it out.) So yeah, I’m pretty much irresistible.

I’ve also decided to stop adding two spaces after full stops. I guess that it was only convention in the time of typewriters and monospace fonts because it was hard to tell when a sentence ended and began. Two spaces fucks up formatting in some cases now that we have truetype fonts and shit. Or something like that. Anyways, I’m conforming. I’m no philistine. It’s hard to get used to though. I keep having to backspace my extra space. I suppose old habits are hard to break.

HEY. Some girl added me on Facebook that I met a while ago at a party. I thought she was kinda cute and I hit on her and everything but nothing came of it. Then like two months later she adds me on Fazbuk. Good sign.

Okay, c’est tout. Bye.

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Bored. Sorta tired. It felt like I hardly slept at all last night for some reason. Maybe it was the Red Bull that I had at Downtown Kathy Brown’s that messed my sleep up. Oh well. I’ll fix it tonight.

I’ve been doing that LiveMocha thing. It’s pretty neat. I can say an assortment of Spanish words now. Nothing to useful yet though. I tried doing it today but the lack of sleep makes me feel like a zombie and I hardly remember any of the lessons. OH WELL. I’ll review it tomorrow when I’m feeling fresher.

I’m outtieeeeee.  Easy.

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Late night.  Went to a bar.  Hadn’t seen the people I was with for a while.  They’re cool cats, as most people are.  I saw a girl I hadn’t seen in about fifteen years.  Except I don’t actually remember her.  Apparently she was in my grade.  The weird thing is that I remember her name clearly but I can’t really remember anything aboot her.  Strange.  There were only 11 people in my grade too.  She was so cute.  I tried hitting on her but she wasn’t feeling me.  I ended up hanging out at the bar feeling dejected and depressed.  I wanted her to come up and start talking to me.  Then the drunken touching starts and from there the making out then the phone number.  It’s very formulaic but it’s still incredibly enjoyable.

Maybe next time.

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I don’t want the Quicktime update and I sure as shit don’t want Safari on my computer.  Please fuck off.  Thank you.

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Valium + Alex = Contentment.

I was outside having a cigarette and I saw the neighbourhood cat across the street.  I went over and pet it.  Cats are nice.  I wish I wasn’t allergic to them.

Also, I have this urge to sleep outside.  It’s so nice and calm and breezy out there.  When I buy a house it’s going to have a balcony attached to my room.  And some nights I’ll wheel my bed out and sleep out there.  I can’t wait.

I’d consider just bringing a blow up mattress out there and sleeping but I think that my parents might think I’m insane and I think I’ve caused them enough worry.

I had an interview today.  I think it went well.  I’ll know by next week whether or not I got the job.  Wish me luck.

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1. Awake.

2. Coffee and cigarette.  And breakfast.

3. Script.

4. Go for a bike ride.

5. Come back and do some random exercises if I’m feeling energetic.

6. Lay in the sun whilst smoking cigarettes.

7. Script.

8. Eat in between everything.

9. Coffee after dinner.

10. Random conversations until bed time.

Rinse and repeat.

Also, I went to the beach yesterday.  It was nice.  I hadn’t been in a while.  I took my friend to Port Stanley and we chilled out, had a drink, and swam a bit.  When I got home I realised something: the best part about going out is coming home and seeing my Gmail notifier lit up, XChat flashing, and new WLM conversation windows open.  I’m pathetic.  But in a good way.

I have a job interview tomorrow for telephone surveys.  I plan to show up dressed for success and ready to impress.  I need cheddar.  Adsense just isn’t cutting it.

Aurevoir.

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Going to bed early and waking up in the middle of the night.  I went to sleep at ten and just woke up at 1:30.  THIS SHOULD NOT HAPPEN.

Oh yeah.  I just had this weird dream.  I was driving with my brother and I knew that it was a dream and for some reason I started jerking off in the passenger seat.  And then I thought, “Oh shit.  What if this isn’t a dream?”  And so I look over to my brother and he’s like, “Wtf are you doing?”  And I say, “This is a dream, isn’t it?”  And he gets SO angry and goes, “This isn’t a dream!” and then I wake up.  It was a trip.

I also had sex with some girl earlier.  Only she was on my computer monitor.  It was weird.

And my cousin told me he hated me.

AND the second time I woke up I was scripting LW stuff.  I was trying to figure out how many elements were in a certain page or something.  I think I’ve been scripting too much lately.

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And the sunlight in the afternoon.

Driving around on a summer evening is really nice.  I like the smell especially.  It reminds me of being a kid and getting carted around by my parents.  It’s nice.  But it’d be better if there was someone I liked sitting in the passenger seat.  OH WELL.

My stomach hurts.  Fuck you.

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My friends and I hung out tonight.  We ended up wandering around my neighbourhood.  It was  lot like old times when we were little kids.  We’d egg houses and nicky-nine-door houses and just cause general mischief.  We meandered back to my place and had a fire in my firepit in the backyard along with a couple of beers.  It was cool.  We also found some piece of wood on the way there.  It ended up being broken in half on the way to my place.  I threw my half onto the street or someone’s lawn (I can’t remember) and my friend took the other half to my place.  I told that fucker to take it away from my crib when he left cause I didn’t want it and he seemed to listen to me.

However, about twenty minutes ago he messaged me on MSN and told me to check my front door.  I already knew what was gonna be there.  It was the piece of wood leaning up against the wall on my front deck.  So I, half naked and half drunk, drove back to his place and stuck it in his backyard leaning up against his wall.  I then messaged him and told him it was there.  I can’t wait for him to see it.  This is all probably a lot more amusing to me because I’ve been drinking than it will be to whoever reads this.  OH WELL.

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And with the other hand, I hold my pants up.

I need a new belt.

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I’m beginning to believe that I should start using more derogatory names when dealing with cashiers, tellers, etc.  For instance.

Cashier - And one dollar and twenty five cents is your change.

Me - Thanks, sugar tits.

Their reaction alone would probably be priceless.

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So I’ll write a wee entry in place of sleep.  Or somn.  Or sommeil.  Or whatever you want to call it.

I went out for the first time tonight in about a week since my ear has been tweaked.  I had a beer with mi muchacho Matt downtown.  It was boring as all hell cause it had been raining all night and was still, in fact, raining when we visited the bar.  I had two Labatt Blues and some poutine then we hopped back in my car and went home.

I felt out of it.  And still do as a matter of fact.  But tasting beer was pretty sweet.  I think that I had been going through withdrawals cause while I was driving there I couldn’t wait to arrive and down some booze.

Tonight has been kind of lame.  I’ve been lonely and bored.  If it wasn’t so late I’d consider calling that girl from a couple weeks ago and making her come over.

Also my keyboard is dying so I’m ending this entry.

Also, I was sitting in the doctor’s office with like three other people and it was so quiet.  I started daydreaming that I was this dynamo type guy and I started talking to everyone.  And we all became friends and were laughing and having a blast while sitting and waiting to be called in.  Like when you meet strangers and one person introduces you to everyone else then you all end up having a ball.  So yeah.  It was like that and then someone would get called in and we’d all be like, “Bye!  It was nice meeting you!”  But…  I sat there staring straight ahead instead.  Maybe next time.

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